Tuesday, July 28, 2009

What is it that make it so hard for people to talk to each other and how to overcome emotional war

it's been quite a while since I last blogged,
quite a long time actually,
i guess i'm not that expressive of my thoughts do I?
Well,that's the title of this very post for the day
Why is it so hard for people to talk to other people???

In my opinion,the first reason would be because
the way some people are brought up
in.Let me start from the the movie "A Thousand Years of Good Prayers".In the movie, the daughter character,Yanlin, was brought up in an environment whereby her parents didn't discuss much of their problems,even the critical ones.For example Mr. Shi don't even bother to talk to his wife about his rumoured love scandal with another women and how he ended up working as a clerk instead of a rocket scientist that he claimed to be.All this secrecy has led Yanlin to believe that it is a norm for Chinese people to keep their problems to themselves. This may be the reason why she was so reluctant when her father put an effort to have a chat with her about the pain that she had experienced.This situation is true in the real world we're living in.If we find it hard to express ourselves at home, then how are suppose to talk to people at work,and be heard? So be more talkative,chit chat with your parents,sisters and brothers,it'll make you to be use to it.

Besides that,some human beings are just scared that other people might sense something wrong in a statement that we made.That is the
feeling insecure about ourselves that made us to hold back from what we were about to do.I talk from my own experience here.Sometimes, during secondary class,it was just better to zip up my mouth than saying something that might cause other people to think I'm stupid or some sort.I was afraid what people might think of me back at that time.But now in college,I learned that this isn't the best way of learning something.This fear is something to be worried about.The same thing happen to Mr Shi.He was scared of the reaction of his wife if he tell her about his false rumuored love scandal with one of his colleagues(although the scandal might be true and he just doesn't know it's love).Because of that,he just buried this secret deep in his heart and hoped that no one would ever try to dig it up back.

Generation gap
also is one of the main reason to cause this problem.When two person of different generation tries to talk,it's hard for them to find the topics of interest that seems appealing to both partiesThis thing happens to everyone of us,isn't it?We put an "understanding " facial expression when our fathers talks about politics,we skipped the business section in the news paper and go straight to celebrity section, and even our parents would resented or maybe hesitate a bit when we try to follow the nowadays trend,such as owning numbers of gadjetsat one time,or going for movies at night...

Yanlin and Mr Shi face this problem everytime they try to bond,especially on the dinner table. Yanlin was busy with her work and going out with friends for movies whilst her father was figuring out hard of who would be her future husband and the life that she should be leading by then.This has made Yanlin to feel irritated by her father for not trying to understand her situation,and has actually widen the gap between the two.

In the movie,Mr Shi also faces some
emotional war and it had clearly affected others life(Yanlin and her mother).For me,the best and the only way to fight this war is to open up your heart.Share the suffering with other people to lessen the burden.This practise will indirectly make you feel relieved and free,as you've finally open the darkest secret that had been in eating yourselves for decades..It will also stop other people from speculating something is wrong with you..(People nowadays enjoy sad stories of others,unfortunately)..

That's all for now, bye2:)

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Unexpectedly Good Movie!

so,last wednesday,after a class with Mr. Derick had been cancelled,I went back home, and watch this unexpectedly great movie....the title is ....Taken!
Although I hesitated at first to watch it since there was a handful of homeworks needed to be done,but after some thinking,I decided that I need some distressing moment...
So,I watched it,and it is nothing like I have expected,I thought that it was going to be the lame action stereotypical movie,but I was certainly wrong.

Taken is a story about the danger when two 17 year old girl went to a vacation trip all around Europe(although in the movie only involve Paris).That is what happen when Kim (Maggie Grace) and Amanda (Katie Cassidy) traveled together and socialize with strangers without knowing no boundaries..They just "judge a book by it's cover" when they decided to share a cab with a cute stranger with his sexy accent whom they just met at the airport....and they ended up being abducted and are forced to be a prostitute..When I say "forced",I mean to say that they are being injected with drugs,even when they were doing the sexual relationship...which is gross and very inhumane...

Now,the interesting part of the story is that the father of one of the girls,which is the brilliant actor Liam Neeson(as Bryan),is actually a retired CIA officer who fortunately still has the edges to strike and kick ass like Silvester Stallon does in "Rambo 3"...He love his daughter very much and he is capable of killing anyone who dares to stop his way in finding his daughter.Ironically, Bryan initially feel bad about letting her daughter to travel with her friend,as his experience as a CIA officer taught him the "darkside" of the world.But,because her daughter wanted to go so much,he just let her go(although he knows that his daughter is lying to him by telling him she is only going to Paris)

The best part of the story is all about the action.All the fighting,explosion,car flying over a road towards a yacht,jumping from a bridge,simply sends stimulation to my brain to develop the feeling of over-excitement! However,do you realize in some action packed movies, where there's nothing that can stop the hero,and the hero never dies,even in a situation whereby there are 10 people shooting bullets at him.It's really unrealistic and unlogical right?well, unfortunately,this movie is no different..the father seems to be a very lucky person since he can escape every single bullet triggered towards him.

What shocked me is that even in Paris, there are crazy people who are smuggle in women, addicting them to drugs,and BOOM! they are prostitutes.. and also the fact they bid on all of the smuggled women in a 5-star hotel! This shows how big the prostitutes business are..It struck through my mind now of how unfortunate the life of all the girls who had been involved in such case in the real world..It has never been their choice,they are just trying to stay alive,to keep living, hoping that someday someone would find them and pull them out of their misery...

Back to the movie,overall,it's better than I had expected,and a good movie to see on a peaceful Saturday night...that's all for now,HAPPY WEEKENDS :)

Friday, February 27, 2009

the not so fortunate events

1)The Flasher

It happened last year,when I was on the way back from KLCC with one of my friend..

We were sitting and chit chatting with each other in the LRT train...when suddenly,an ungroomed dirty looking man came inside...He was so unappropriately dressed,as if someone had rapped him or some sort...So he sat in front of us,staring us sharply like we're the devil in his head....just when I was about to ignore him,I realised "something" was left open....That was his zipper.I was stunned,I mean,should I tell him?Was he that stupid not to wear an underwear??what should I say to him..hello mr.,don't you feel a bit windy today??My friend got worried and and gives a handsign to the lady sitting next to the "guy",and the way she reacts suprised me...She showed us a handful of fist,as if she were a wrestler,trying to tell us that she can defend herself....Then.suddenly, BAAM!,the guy went acting like a drunk and unstabily fell his heads towards her hips(she was wearing shorts).....gosh!...We were all shocked..

and he worst thing was,his wide opened mouth let out several drops of sticky mucus... Yuck,Gross! Luckily some of the guys kicked him out of the train at the next stop..

2)bumping up a ghost...

haha,this is going to be quite intriguing..When I was in standard 6,I went for a school camp at (guess what),Dusun Eco Resort,Pahang!

It was during the second night,while I was walking with my friends to go to a hall for some activity..I saw something at the other side of the road the we were passing by....

It was something white...something wrapped....and it was standing still.....Yikes..it was a creepy experience...I don't know why I even bother to look at it when my friend suggest me too..I sure regret that now..What shocked me is that I was at that time walking in a big group of people... and for some reason,all the other students didn't seem to noticed that "supernatural thingy " that is just standing about 3 metre away from where we were... OR...

Do I actually have the 6th sense?Nah,I don't think so..I cannot even stand horror movies for God sake...hahaha,even worms can make me jump my butt out off me....that was my first time and hopefully the last one...maybe I should bring garlics with me this summer camp,to scare off vampires...Scary...

3) When I was on a vacation in Kedah with my whole family,during the night,we went to the market,which sell plentiful of stuff from raw foods(meats) to clothes..When we were walking,while checking out all the variety of things,suddenly,out of no where....Poop! a sound of a small branch came down to me from up above and hit my spectacles...And surprisingly,my spectacles break into two,right at the middle...Can you ever imagine stuff like that happening to you? the chances is like one in a million....and the weird thing is that the fact that there were no trees above the market area...Hmm..I think someone must have threw it to the air...that incident cause me to see barely nothing during my vacation trip in Kedah...?What a turn off...

4) I have always been afraid of being on stage..I think I'm just born like that..Because bad things always happen when I am on one..During my years in a religous school,I was in a nasyid(singing) competition..My group has practise for month for that particular competition.Before our turn to perform,I was feeling well and okay,just relaxed and calm...Then our time came,when I was standing there in front of the judges and crowds,at that moment my lesgs felt weak,It was trembling and I can't control it..I was trying really hard to control myself,but failed..and then I opened my mouth to sing..and the worst thing happened..My voice sounded very,very shaky and weird...I never expected that to happen..It didn't even sound like my voice! Oh my God, that was a very embarassing moment...We ended up to loose in the competition,and it wasn't a shocking news to me,there were better groups at that time...That's when I realize how hard it is for someone to perform in front of thousands of people..I respect them for that...

hopefully,we can learn something from our own mistakes in the past and make sure it doesn't happen again next time..

Friday, February 6, 2009

Tips for an unforgettable study time!

I know,most of us always have our own problems when it comes to utilisizing our study time in an 'unwasteful' way..
Me myself have the same problem,and it starts from a very-very long time ago.sleepyness, boredom,don't have the mood,high level of tension pilling inside your brain,I've undergone probably most of it...as I am not born to be having a genius brain unless i "break a leg" for it. But, as time passses by,I realized that there are some ways of maximising my effectiveness of study time..

1.If you are sleepy,do yourself a favour by getting a nap first
When I say a nap,I do mean it,not get a 'sleep' okay.A nap is basically a short and brief sleep that only being done for a maximum period of 2 hors maximum(my own definition).As Mr. Al told me once upon a time,the best cure for feeling sleepy is to indulge yourself in it.I've tried it and it's true,but for one condition.Make sure that you set several alarms time in your mobile phone, because the first alarm won't be enough to get you on your tired feet.And set the volume to the maximum,it is vital.

2.Get yourself some beats.
Do you remember the time when you starting to get bored of the book you are reading eventhough you enjoyed it at first?Well,that is the time where music comes to heal your soul.
Music is one of the best way to push boredom aside from your shoulder..If you are studying mathematics,than it is best for you to prepare yourself with upbeats musics,like R&b and rock songs,like one of rihanna song,"please don't stop the music"....But,if you are studying biology,do get yourself some motivating songs,which are not too touchy and slow(it will inspire you to continue studying).I've tried this methods for years and it sure does help me..but if you purposely wants to get very sleepy while studying so that you can take a nap,or just go to sleep,than it's a good time to listen to slow,melodious song,for example like songs from "winter Sonata" drama that really dozes me off my chair.

One of the best creation of men would have to be Nescafe(my favourite drink).Besides from the amazing aroma that creeps into your nose,nescafe also is a great 'anti'sleepy drink.. Drinking nescafe can get my eyes to remain open for approximately 1.5 hours..It's very useful when you need to catch up deadlines or you suddenly remember that you have plenty of unfinished assignments in the last minutes.But,It's never good to consume Nescafe everyday(I'm talking to myself),as I read from an e-mail someone send me..But,if you are looking for Nescafe, always take Nescafe mild or original,because that's the best there is!

4.Dont force yourself too hard
If you are not in the mood to study,than I would suggest you to stop it.It's not always right to push yourself too hard.Everyone has their own study limit,if you are bored or realized that nothing can penetrate into your brain then fine.Do something else first,go watch television or water the flowers in your garden first(not in student houses,of course)...It's better to stop at the limit,as you can get yourself insanely and brutally stressed out if you cross the borderline. So what,reshcedule your time management.But some people are just too busy to reschedule that they actually tormenting their brain to work harder without getting any payback.

I guess that's all from me.

Saturday, January 24, 2009


so today is the third day of my Chinese New Year holiday, and I really having a hard time choosing which topic to write onto this piece of post.....
I finally made up my mind to write about my Ausmat programme...so I'm going to tell you about 80% of the programme and 20% crap okay? BUT, please bare with me and don't fall asleep while reading this...:) as I always start up slow but eventually pick up the momentum and fly...fly away...

My ausmat programme started on Jun last year.To put it in a summary,Ausmat is kind of a foundation programme for student who particularly aspire to continue their study in "Australia". okay,why do I put this( " ) sign? That's because the country that I am bound to study is New Zealand baby...(this really pressures me as most of my friends and classmates are heading to the "world down under",with friends whom they already known for one and a half year,while me and my other 4 friends have to start all over again in finding friends)...haha..I know I sounded like a spoiled brat.But I have always disguise of the fact that I have to find a new circle of friends..I will feel so solitary and left alone...but I'm sure it will all be okay...just have to have faith in God..
(I am out of topic didn't I?)ok,so let's get back on track

Actually the time duration for an Ausmat course is actually one year,But for some reason, all the jpa scholars have to start the course six months earlier.But I see a lot of benefits to this as we have learned soo much in the bridging programme..I mean,I can't imagine if I just start my course this January,my head would be all rusty brown and empty,filled with nothing but dust from the spm leftovers,hahaha....So the bridging programme for the first six months is basically to prepare us for the IELTS exam,which is a standard English test that is recognised in most countries in the world.Anyone who resit for the paper would have to pay a "monstrous" value of RM500!! which is very expensive for me..and I'm sure to my colleagues as well..but luckily most of us passed in the exam...but hey,good luck for my friends who's taking the test for the second time...after all of your hard work,burning the midnight oil until you have to carry the baggy eyes to class,I'm sure you'll make it for the second time...

Now,2009 has come,where my real journey of the Ausmat begins...Ms Prema has once told me, Once this year starts,take a really really deep breath and hold it,hold it, and hold it, until you finally finish your Ausmat course...I think that's true...(suddenly I remembered Sarah telling me she tried it before but but her deep breath only last for a few countable seconds)haha, that's so funny Sarah...and the heat of Ausmat has already starting to burn the tip of my hair.... All of the sudden, assignment, quizes, homeworks, monthly test(which is very important by the way) pilled onto my body as fast as a flash of lightning....but guess what,this is what I have expected of what to come this year....that is the crystal clear fact..no kidding,this is the only chance that I could possibly have, to go to the country where they filmed my all time favourite "The Lord Of The Ring" triology.It's like I have to shoot the red dot on the dart board with only one bullet spare in my shotgun (I'm bad in giving analogy you see..)So dear God,please help me help myself to not blew this one chance..

No more games,no more procasinating,I have to put myself together for this.I'm going to strive "after" this Chinese New Year holiday(I need a bit of rest first okay).I'm so thankful of having a great team of lecturers who are very special in their own way of lecturing and friends who are very very helpful....this is all I can say about Ausmat...it's not a very clear description of the Ausmat as I will still have to go trough it this year,like a blank canvas waiting to be drawn with bright and dark colours. Hopefully next year,I'll be able to look back and cheerish my years in this lovely college ,

KBU International College.

and to Mr Derick,Happy Chinese New Year.Gong Xi Fa Cai!!

Gong Xi , Gong Xi!!

bye - bye..

Friday, January 16, 2009

The Q and A session

1)where do you read and study?

To tell you the truth,it really depends on my mood.If I feel like studying by myself,then I would lock myself in the bedroom.Far away from all the callings for indulgenses and unthinkable distractions.I guess I prefer to study alone.Me and group study never had a chemistry.When me and my friends were studying together,we always ended up cit chatting,talk- talk- talk and suddenly,it's already past 2 in the morning, although we both know that we should stop talking,but neither of us dare to stop the relaxing and de-stressing conversation.....and there goes my so called "study".Conclusion is,go with what suits you the best

2)What is the best time for you to read?

I guess the best time for me to read is when I don't have anything else to do and my stomach is 75% full.The reason for the first one is that when I read about something that is full of boredom and uninteresting,I always try to find something else to do,even considering doing house chores activities,like taking the trash out .This attitude is causing problems to me,it's like I am lying to myself saying that: Ok Hazman,after you watch Heroes then you go and study,no no no,after Heroes,go and eat ice cream first,then you go study......and it goes on and on...And as for the second best time to read,I found it really hard to concentrate on reading after I ate too much..my mind will go unstably flying across all my thoughts,floating through the breeze of the night air,into dark blue sky full of stars,and KABOOM! (the sound of my head hitting the table) fall asleep into the deepest ocean.

3) What type of distraction bother you the most?

It has got to be tv shows...I grew up watching all kinds of tv shows,from Sesame Street to Criminal Minds.And the best part is,I don't even own an "Astro" at home,but I still ended up stucking my two eyeballs at the television screen..I wonder why my father never think of getting an "Astro"....hmmmm...I ponder myself..Even now that I live on my own,internet has become my best friend....The perfect companion allowing me to catch up on my favourite shows...hahaha

4)What types of rewards might work for you?

MONEY! of course..Money really does motivate me to achieve something from when I was young..My parents told me told me if get good results,they will send in some money into my CIMB account...WOW!isn't that statement refreshing and fascinating at the same time?It certainly does boost my drive to work hard for the next coming exam.With money,we can do a lot of things with our friends.Go for a movie,a fancy dinner at Italiannes,shop till you drop at the ever-linking shopping complexes at Bandar Utama,pay petrols to go for more mileage,and other expenditure related activities.All of these needs money, people..Although i might sound "a bit" materialistic but I still have a good heart...I know that there many bigger issues happening around the globe like starvation and the never-ending wars,but with money,we can help them to have a better life.But unfortunately there are so many people taking advantages of the situation,that it's hard to see how the system works anymore.Corruption is everywhere and the the innocence have to pay the price.I mean for example,when we donate money for the war refugees,how do we know if the donation will be channeled 100% to the ones who need it? Am I right or am I not wrong?

I realized that money plays an important role for a person who holds the position of a leader.

(I learned this from the Malaysian politicians) When the "right" person is holding a big amount of money,he has the power to change the world into a better place.Then only people will listen to him/her...in other words, money = power.Right?

Other rewards that may work for me is foods..Although I eat to live and not live to eat kind of a person,but i appreciate the variety of foods that I can get in my own country.There is certainly no other place like home. We are always indulged by 'overseas cooking shows' that produces delicacies that looks delicious, juicy and colourful,but believe me,Malaysians tongue and non- Malaysians tongue are different.To them,the definition of tasty food is different from our's.We love sambal belacan and durian,but they don't.Pity them:(...because sambal and durian are the best!

Thursday, January 8, 2009

My Beloved Family

The reason why I choose this topic is because my family is very important and they mean everything to me.My family consist of 7 members,including my parents.I have 2 elder sister,one younger sister and brother.I'm going to start of with my father.He has been retired for the pass 3 years.He stays at home and take care of my younger sister and brother who is 14 and 9 years old respectively.He likes to read and had a big collection of encyclopedias at home.He always encourage us to read his encyclopedias in order to gain knowledge.He is the leader of the family,as usual,and he is also the 'bank',that gives me money for my survival in this expensive world.

Next is my mother.She is currently working as a clerk at Agro Bank in Kuala Lumpur.She likes to cook.She will cook everyday for breakfast before she goes to work and dinner at night.She is a very hardworking and a great mother.But she has a weakness,that is towards cooking appliances.She always buy and keep it in the store room for future use.And the future seems endless, causing her to forget that she had ever purchase to item.But anyway,she is a very gentle person.She knows what to say at the right time,if you are feeling sad,her lectures are going to get you recharged again,regardless of what situation you are in.

My eldest sister is working as an internal auditor at the Mofaz Holding,and my second elder sister is doing her degree in accounting in UITM Shah Alam.They both have always love numbers,and it certainly shows in what course that they have coosen and I bet they really apply what they have learned,as they are also very good in spending money within budgjet.Although in the childhood years they have frequently bullied me, but as we all grow up, we tend to forgive forget the past and eventually became close with each other.

Last but not least my younger sister and brother.My sister is cuurently studying in a secondary school.She is a very active student.She plays netball,futsal,learn taekwan - do,and a very good marathon runner.Going through the life of a teenager,she always have something interesting to tell everyone at home of what had happened in school(other than her love story I mean).She also likes to cook and aspire to become a proffesional chef one day.While my youngest brother is a bit diferent.His ambition is to become a doctor speciallizing in surgeon.He is a very funny person that make jokes even without him realizing it.For example, I remember this one incident whereby my family had just finish dinner at a restaurant that serves soups.After paying the bill,my mother ask him what is the most expensive soup we had.And then he looked at the receipt and said it would be "sub total". He was assuming that the word sub is the the same as the word soup.Haha!.It's a moment that I would never forget.

Having a family is really a gift from God.Although sometimes I feel annoyed or angry because of their attitude or actions towards me,they are the ones that always stand by my side giving me support when I face problems in life.I have to bear in mind that I also might have done something that hurts them,maybe that's why they treat me badly.For better or for worse.A family can never be changed.I love them the way they naturally are,as me myself is not perfect.